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2020-09-22T06:57:29

Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.

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2020-09-17T16:58:53

Q: How many college football players does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Only one, but he gets three credits for it.

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2020-09-16T23:40:38

You will be married within a year.

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2020-09-16T19:56:39

Q: How do you stop an elephant from charging? A: Take away his credit cards.

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2020-09-13T12:20:49

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself. -- Mark Twain

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2020-09-11T18:19:33

O, what a tangled web we weave, When first we practice to deceive. -- Sir Walter Scott, "Marmion"

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2020-09-10T17:13:57

This life is yours. Some of it was given to you; the rest, you made yourself.

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2020-09-10T08:45:38

You recoil from the crude; you tend naturally toward the exquisite.

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2020-09-09T20:45:28

You are always busy.

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2020-09-08T07:27:25

Don't kiss an elephant on the lips today.

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