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2021-07-26T05:10:14

A Tale of Two Cities LITE(tm) -- by Charles Dickens A man in love with a girl who loves another man who looks just like him has his head chopped off in France because of a mean lady who knits. Crime and Punishment LITE(tm) -- by Fyodor Dostoevski A man sends a nasty letter to a pawnbroker, but later feels guilty and apologizes. The Odyssey LITE(tm) -- by Homer After working late, a valiant warrior gets lost on his way home.

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2021-07-26T01:55:26

If you laid all of our laws end to end, there would be no end. -- Mark Twain

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2021-07-26T00:19:37

Q: What do you call a blind, deaf-mute, quadraplegic Virginian? A: Trustworthy.

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2021-07-25T07:42:19

There was a phone call for you.

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2021-07-23T15:17:22

Q: What do you call a blind, deaf-mute, quadraplegic Virginian? A: Trustworthy.

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2021-07-22T19:46:30

Just because the message may never be received does not mean it is not worth sending.

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2021-07-21T22:02:10

Do not sleep in a eucalyptus tree tonight.

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2021-07-13T09:50:19

Q: Why is Poland just like the United States? A: In the United States you can't buy anything for zlotys and in Poland you can't either, while in the U.S. you can get whatever you want for dollars, just as you can in Poland. -- being told in Poland, 1987

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2021-07-11T13:27:36

Do something unusual today. Pay a bill.

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2021-07-09T16:57:09

You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.

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