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2019-05-19T13:52:02

Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run. -- Mark Twain

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2019-05-16T13:24:29

You will be held hostage by a radical group.

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2019-05-15T17:51:52

Go not to the elves for counsel, for they will say both yes and no. -- J.R.R. Tolkien

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2019-05-07T08:15:29

Delores breezed along the surface of her life like a flat stone forever skipping along smooth water, rippling reality sporadically but oblivious to it consistently, until she finally lost momentum, sank, and due to an overdose of flouride as a child which caused her to suffer from chronic apathy, doomed herself to lie forever on the floor of her life as useless as an appendix and as lonely as a five-hundred pound barbell in a steroid-free fitness center. -- Winning sentence, 1990 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.

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2019-05-06T18:03:33

You are a fluke of the universe; you have no right to be here.

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2019-05-06T15:51:57

I dote on his very absence. -- William Shakespeare, "The Merchant of Venice"

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2019-05-06T01:47:30

Q: How can you tell when a Burroughs salesman is lying? A: When his lips move.

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2019-05-06T01:39:52

You had some happiness once, but your parents moved away, and you had to leave it behind.

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2019-05-01T23:49:36

You attempt things that you do not even plan because of your extreme stupidity.

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2019-04-29T21:01:50

You will visit the Dung Pits of Glive soon.

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